The Birth Story of Baby Darius

The Birth Story of Baby Darius

It’s hard to know where to start with Darius’ birth story, as there were several starts-and-stops along the way during the last week or so of my pregnancy. Joel will shake his head and say something along the lines of “shouldn’t a midwife know when she is in labor?”, but once again I had trouble figuring it out.

To give some background (especially if you’ve read my previous birth stories), we had used our dear friend Rose as our midwife with our girls, and she ended up being the first one on the scene after Matthias was born (she was home on a school break THAT weekend, and our midwife was on her way from Lancaster, but Matthias came in a hurry-read his birth story here). We love her, but due to a variety of reasons (especially the fact that Joel has no desire to ever catch one of his own babies again) we decided that this time we needed to use a midwife who lives closer to us. In the past two years I have been blessed to meet and work with Rose Marie Spicher, a midwife who lives half an hour away, and who worked for years in TX (where I did my midwifery training). She provided the “mothering” care I needed throughout my pregnancy, and it gave Joel a sense of relief to know she wasn’t too far away. With me being on maternity leave the month of May, and the fact that everyone else was expecting in May as well (I have NEVER received so many inquiries for one particular month!), I was just hoping that she wouldn’t be tied up whenever our baby decided to come!

So fast-forward through all the months of sickness, fatigue, finding out that we were expecting a baby brother (the children are still certain this was a direct result of their prayers, as I was convinced it had to be a girl given how sick I was!), and everything else until the beginning of May. By early May I was reaching that totally-done-being-pregnant stage where I wasn’t sleeping at night, having lots of cramps  & contractions, felt extremely emotional all the time, and we were wondering just when this little fellow would decide to make his appearance. Between 34-36 weeks I was experiencing enough cramps and contractions to know I needed to take it easy, and once we hit 36 weeks I had a couple of times where I thought perhaps we were getting started-I distinctly remember one night when I couldn’t sleep because of contractions, so Joel & I slipped outside to take a walk in the moonlight. It would have been so romantic if I hadn’t been so uncomfortable! But everything always fizzled away, and left me feeling tired and discouraged.

At this point we were preparing for a visit from my parents, who live in Kansas. My sister had her first baby the month before, and my mom wanted to come out to help her over the time my brother-in-law was graduating and they were preparing to move. So she flew into northern PA, spent a few days with my sister, and was then joined by my dad. The plan was that they would drive down to see us before they headed back to Kansas, and of course we hoped that baby would arrive before they left, though we knew it was entirely possible that he would wait until they were home again. However, with all the early labor signs I had been experiencing, I’ll admit that I was getting my hopes up! Mom & Dad planned to arrive on Mother’s Day, and the night before I was trying to encourage things along, and ended up with a night of contractions with no baby to show for it. Everything was regular enough that I actually called my midwife to give her a heads up, but then it all petered out.

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Mother’s Day 2017

I really had to work through the disappointment of knowing that perhaps my folks wouldn’t get to meet their grandson on this trip. We didn’t know when we would be seeing them next, and I hadn’t realized just how much I had my heart set on them getting to be here to see MY baby while he was new and tiny. It took some talking, praying, crying and processing with Joel to get to the point of being okay with the fact that perhaps this time with mom & dad was to be spent enjoying their company and not stressing over whether baby was here or not. So for the next few days, my parents helped to take my mind off of waiting for baby, and we enjoyed some lovely family time at the park, taking walks, picnics, a backyard barbeque, and some time for Joel & I to be together while our children were cared for.

The last night of their visit, they took our two oldest children back to stay the night with them in their cabin. In the interest of full disclosure, I had taken some castor oil in the afternoon, knowing full well that there was a good possibility nothing would come of it, and yet hoping that perhaps it would give my body the nudge it seemed to be waiting for. I was NOT going to get my hopes up, though, and I tried to just go to bed to get some sleep. I think it was around midnight or 1am when I woke up with a contraction, and yet I tried to sleep, as it sure wasn’t the first time that random contractions had woken me up at night! After an hour or so of not really sleeping, I figured I might as well get up to see if moving around made them go away or get stronger.

Joel sweetly got up with me, and fixed me sourdough toast with strawberry jam-his mom had given me jam and sourdough bread the week before, and it was becoming a regular midnight tradition to eat a piece when I couldn’t sleep! After another hour or so, Joel commented that these contractions seemed to be pretty regular and close together. I did NOT want to give another false alarm to anyone, and didn’t feel sure that this was anything more than what had happened on previous nights. Looking back, they were coming close together (every 2-4 minutes!), but they weren’t very intense, and they didn’t last long, so I wasn’t convinced they were doing anything. With my previous babies, my water had always broken either before labor began or at the start of active labor, so I kept waiting for that to be the clue that this was the “real thing”.

At 4:00am, Joel really felt like we should call Rose Marie, as he said he thought this seemed more serious, and he did NOT want to wait until it was too late! So I  called Rose Marie, and I told her I still wasn’t sure this was “it”, yet Joel would feel better if she came, but she didn’t need to rush. The contractions were starting to get a bit more of an “edge” to them that took my breath away, but I still felt like I could make myself talk through them, though I preferred not to. Another sign I should have paid attention to!

Within 15 min of calling Rose Marie, all of a sudden things kicked in with a vengeance. Up till now I had still been puttering around, but hadn’t gotten birth stuff out yet, as I had gotten it all out and then had to put it all away a few nights before. I wanted to make sure I was in REAL labor before getting everything set up again, and figured I could do it in between contractions as a distraction. Well, that’s not how things happened. Labor went from being “not sure this is it” to “we’re in seriously active labor” in a few minutes! Joel called Rose Marie back and told her to step on it, and then he promptly called Lynelle (my birth assistant who was planning to assist Rose Marie with our birth-she lives less than five minutes away) and told her to come. I think it was around 4:30am when Joel called Lynelle, and boy did she know how to get over to our place in a hurry! Joel said he has never in his life been so happy to see Lynelle walk into a room, and it was just in time.

By this point my contractions were one on top of another, and I felt like I didn’t have any time to collect myself, catch my breath or get a break in between. Joel kept encouraging me to breathe through them (he didn’t want me pushing!), and I was leaning over the birth ball squeezing his hands for all I was worth, just praying that God would make it stop so I could catch my breath. Lynelle quickly realized things were serious, and started pulling all the birth supplies together. All of a sudden I told them there was no way I could keep from pushing any longer. It had been taking everything I had to blow through contractions, and I was done. I distinctly remember saying “you all are just going to have to catch this baby ‘cause I can’t keep him in any longer!” Lynelle calmly replied that everything was okay, and with the next contraction my water broke. Now I can laugh about it-that was the clue I had been waiting for all along to tell me if I was actually in labor! With the next contraction Lynelle could see his head, and she did an awesome job of coaching me through as I tried to breathe him out. Right at the point his head was delivering, Rose Marie walked in the room! Lynelle started to move out of the way, but Rose Marie just smiled and said it looked like she was doing a great job, so she might as well continue. Rose Marie guided Lynelle through the rest of her “first catch”, and the official birth time was 4:56am.

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Those first moments after birth…

I can still remember the absolute relief that comes from being finished, and laying down with my baby on my chest. He cried just enough for us to know he was great, and then he snuggled on my chest, and we all exclaimed over his head full of strawberry blonde hair-that was a surprise! We had a really special next hour or so as we reflected over the crazy labor, the special-ness of the unplanned “first catch” for Lynelle, Rose Marie’s perfect timing, and Joel’s relief that he didn’t have to do this birth alone. We had invited another family friend to be present at the birth, and sadly she didn’t make it time, but her sweet & joyous spirit added to the atmosphere in the room as Joel fixed breakfast and baby Darius had his first meal. Thanks for coming, Mary!

And then it was SO amazing to call my parents and tell them that their grandson had arrived! Having them able to bring our oldest two over first thing that morning was so special. They were able to watch the newborn exam, meet our midwives, and see the children as they delighted in meeting their new sibling. It was the “icing on the cake” to have them around, and able to snuggle their newest grandbaby that morning, before they had to leave that afternoon to catch their flight home.

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Yoanna & Matthias and Grandma & Grandpa meeting baby Darius. Yoanna was delighted to help Lynelle give him his first bath!

We had struggled with finding the right name for our little guy, and settled on Darius Rafael just a few weeks before his birth. Darius means “Upholder of Good” and Rafael means “God is Healer”.  It is our prayer that our little son will grow into a man who does good, and is used to provide God’s healing to others. He checked out at 8# 10 oz, and measured 20 in long. Matthias was absolutely delighted to have a baby brother, and they continue to have a special relationship as brothers.

Here’s a few more snapshots of Darius’ “birth” day…enjoy this glimpse into our little family’s life, and feel free to check out the birth stories of our girls, Talitha & Yoanna.

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Big sister Talitha was pretty excited to wake up and find that baby brother had “come out!”

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Rose Marie checking baby out

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Our amazing birth team-thanks so much for everything!!

Birth Photographers: Local Options!

Birth Photographers: Local Options!

If you’ve been following the Gentle Delivery Facebook page (go like and follow here), you’ll remember seeing some photos this month of adorable newborns. April has brought some really cute babies! And there is something so precious and amazing about how these babies look in the first minutes and hours that can’t be captured at any other time. I am personally SO grateful for the dear ladies who took photos during those initial moments with my babies (one of my highlights of my baby born last year!), and it’s been something that I wish more women could have access to.

However, when I moved to State College, I was quite surprised to find out that birth photography itself isn’t a “thing” in this area. There are some great photographers willing to do newborn and “Fresh 48” sessions, but there’s not options for the mom who wants professional photos taken immediately before, during and after delivery. Now, to be fair, birth photography is a challenge-you’re asking someone to be on call, drop what they’re doing whenever you call, and to commit without knowing when, how long, and all of those details that make planning challenging.

But today I’m delighted to introduce you to some local options for birth photography that have very recently surfaced in this area! So, if you’re interested in hiring a photographer for your birth (one that can take lovely photos instead of the inexperienced shots that your midwife and her assistant get!), hopefully this list can help you by giving you some leads. If you’re wondering what all is possibly entailed in having a birth photographer at your birth, or what types of photos, etc., I would highly recommend you check out the sites of a few birth photographers that work in other areas of the country. A few of my favorites are T. Marie Photography , Monet Nicole, and Lyndsey Stone.

Catherine Malizia: Catherine recently contacted me, telling me of her interest in the area of birth photography. She stopped in my office for a visit, and I had a delightful time chatting with her and hearing about her vision to capture the amazing and special moments of birth for families. She is acquainted with birth in various settings, especially after spending some time serving with Midwives for Haiti. I think Catherine would do a beautiful job of respecting a family’s space and wishes in a birth setting-she definitely had the type of rapport that I think many moms would connect with. If you’re interested in hiring her, I’d recommend getting in touch and asking questions…she may be running some specials as she gets her “birth side” of her photography business off the ground! Besides her website (linked in her name), you can also contact via email: catherine@CatherineMaliziaPhotography.com

Denae VigilanteDenae also works as a doula with the Doulas of Central PA agency. I had the privilege of attending a birth with Denae, and was impressed by her kind, gentle mannerisms. Birth photography is something Denae is doing more of these days, and you can check out some of her albums on her website!

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Photo Credit: Denae @ Vilgilante Photography

Sara BloseSara has recently joined the State College community, and is exited to offer the option of birth photography to her photography options beginning with due dates in November. I’m looking forward to meeting Sara in person, but am glad that there is yet another option for families in this area.

Are you planning to hire a birth photographer for your birth? Or are you local to the Central PA area, and you used a birth photographer? I’d love to hear about your experiences, how you chose your photographer, and what you’re looking forward to the most, or what you appreciated the most about utilizing a photographer. I’m sure other families would love to hear of your experiences, too, so thanks for sharing!!

Postpartum Home Visit in Pictures

Postpartum Home Visit in Pictures

In January, I received a request from a photo-journalism student at Penn State, who wondered if she could photograph me and some “cute babies” for a project. The day after she emailed, little Brielle made her appearance, and Brielle’s family graciously gave permission for Baidi to join us at their home for the second half of their home postpartum visit. Baidi was absolutely tickled to get to see a brand new baby, and gave us all the gift of numerous photos of our time together. For those of you who have wondered what a typical postpartum visit looks like, here’s your peek!

Generally, this visit takes place sometime between 24-48 hours after delivery, as the required tests need to be performed during this window. First mom gets attention, and we talk about how things are going, any issues/concerns, and make sure her physical condition is within normal limits. Then mom or dad checks over the birth certificate info I bring (double checking spelling and any details) while baby gets checked over.

If baby is happy, we start with the pulse oximeter screening for congenital heart defects, a newer requirement in PA for all babies.

Then comes an exam, where baby’s heart rate & respirations are listened to, skin/cord/eye condition are noted, and overall condition is assessed.

Next, baby is weighed in preparation for the newborn metabolic screening (current weight must be listed along with birth weight). Here you can see daddy holding the baby while the blood samples are collected-our hope is to keep the baby feeling safe & secure throughout the experience!

Lastly, baby is snuggled and we go over any other questions or concerns. All the necessary paperwork is gone over and a copy of the newborn exam and newborn screen info is given to the parents for their pediatrician. And all of this without the family needing to leave their own home!

A big thank you to Kelly, Daniel & Brielle for their willingness to share this experience with  you!

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And thank you to Baidi for your great photos!

Looking Back & Looking Forward!

Looking Back & Looking Forward!

As we head into 2018, I want to say thanks to each of the families we served last year. It is always an honor to be asked to care for each mom & baby, and it’s a special privilege to be present when the miracle of birth occurs. It was definitely a year full of variety, with many random & unusual situations and circumstances. Babies ranged from 6 lbs to over 10 lbs, arrived anywhere from over two weeks early to just past two weeks late (!), most came during the night (yay for cooperating with my own sleeping baby!), many were fast labors, and all the moms were amazing! Being a midwife you end up walking with families experiencing great joy as well as heartache when families have to say goodbye before they meet their little ones. There are also the situations that tax your skill and abilities, and the challenges that leave you researching and looking for answers. I am grateful for the opportunity to expand my experience an education, but I’ll also be honest and admit that I’m hoping for less of these experiences in 2018!

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Some of our sweet babies in their “born at home” onesies!

I continue to be grateful for the help of my backup midwife, Rose Marie (who took such good care of clients when I was out of town, and then later on maternity leave), and that of my assistant, Lynelle. Besides being a great assistant, Lynelle also expanded her experience when she ended up catching her first baby (my son!) just as Rose Marie arrived. That was a special surprise for her! Having a team of ladies to depend on, call when needed, and work with definitely helps to make the work of midwifery much more sustainable long-term.

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Fun birth memories with Rose Marie and Lynelle!

As we head into a new year, and anticipate the first babies of 2018 due soon, here’s a few updates:

  • We have some new resources in the library! Two NEW books were published in 2017 that are excellent reads for pregnant moms. The Positive Birth Book by Milli Hall is just what the title describes. And my new favorite pregnancy book is Mama Natural’s Complete Guide to Pregnancy & Birth. It’s a week-by-week guide that covers all the details from growth & development of baby to what you should be eating, thinking about and considering-all from a natural perspective! So far my clients have enjoyed it so much that I now own 3 copies so moms can keep it longer! We also have a copy of the “Why Not Home?” Documentary, which is available for those of you who may want that perspective as you contemplate home birth.
  • A *NEW* birth kit item: upgraded camera! While we can’t promise you professional photos (we are midwives, not photographers!), we have been delighted to add better photos for families who find that aspect important to them. A number of our families are delighted to have some better-quality photos before, during and after birth, especially if hiring a birth photographer is desired but out of reach financially. We occasionally add a third member to our team if photos are something you really want, and a number of our clients have been delighted with the result. Be sure to ask about this at your next visit.
  • New Playdates! We hosted our first mommy meet-up/playdate in the fall of 2017, and it was SUCH fun to see the families and clients that have become friends-we miss you! It was popular enough that we plan to do it again, so if you want to be alerted specifically about the next date, be sure to let me know!

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    Fun with moms and babies at our first playdate!

  • New, upgraded phone for the midwife. 🙂 I know, it’s about time! But if you don’t have my new number and are a former client (current clients all have the new # by this time!) be sure to drop me an email and ask for it!
  • And finally…a new student! Charity is just beginning to “test the waters” to see if unnamed (1) midwifery is her calling, so she’s hoping to attend births in January (as long as babies give her enough time to get here!). We’ll see where things go, but we’re excited to have Charity join our team this month!

And as always, please let me know if you have any topics or suggestions of things you’d like to see covered in future blog posts. I hope to make the website more educational for clients, and would love to have it become a helpful resource for all expectant families! Be sure to follow Gentle Delivery on facebook and instagram, as well, as you never know what news or info may pop up over there!

Blessings in 2018…until next time!

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Topics for 2018 & a Give Away!

Since my fourth child arrived in  May, I’ve been pretty quiet on this site! But now that baby has reached 6 months, and life is settling into more of routine, I’m thinking about the new year. Here’s where I need your help: I would LOVE to hear your ideas of what you would like to see covered in future blog posts! I’d like to realize my goal of one post a month throughout 2018, but I could use some input as I try to sketch out a plan for the next year. I often try to post about topics that are relevant & beneficial to my clients, and for families who are considering midwifery care and/or healthful, natural living. So send me your ideas, and topics you would like to hear more about!

And here is your incentive: each person who submits an idea (either in the comments below, or on our Facebook post with this same title) will be entered into a drawing to receive a copy of one of my favorite pregnancy/birth related books that was published this year. The Mama Natural Week-by-Week Gide to Pregnancy & Childbirth is a wonderful addition to your pregnancy and birth library. Think of it as a “natural version” of the old “What to Expect” favorite. “Mama Natural” covers everything from nutritional needs, what is happening to baby & mom each week of pregnancy, how to prepare for natural birth, pros and cons of multiple caregivers and birth locations, and so many of the questions that moms wonder about during pregnancy. I think you’ll love it, and if you don’t need it yourself, you just might have a friend that would enjoy it!

So here’s the details: submissions can be entered until midnight on Sunday, December 10, and a winner will be announced on Monday, December 11 (unless a baby changes my schedule-I’m a real life midwife, so there’s always the possibility that I may have to announce the winner later!). Entries can be made below in the reply/comments section, or you can enter by leaving a comment below the facebook post with this headline. I’m looking forward to finding out what you all want to discuss, learn and/or find out more resources about in the next year. Thanks for helping me out!

Feel free to share this with friends, so they can enter too!

Is Homebirth the Right Option for Me?

Is Homebirth the Right Option for Me?

As a midwife providing home birth services, I hear this question frequently. It is my goal to provide families with the information they need in order to make the right decision for them-home birth is not for everyone, just like hospital birth is not for everyone! Ultimately, the choice of where to give birth and which care provider to use is the responsibility of the parents seeking such services, and it’s my desire to assist you by providing accurate information that can assist you in making this decision.

Since this question is one of the foundations of whether or not to pursue working with a midwife and planning towards a home birth, I thought it might be helpful to provide links and resources that may help you in determining the answer to this question. As always, I am happy to sit down and talk with anyone who wants to ask specific questions and discuss their options in person, but I know that many of you would like to gather some more detailed information before a formal meeting. Thanks to the availability of information via the internet, great books, educational videos and more, there are many resources that you can access to learn about the potential risks and potential benefits of midwifery care, and specifically the home birth option.

FILMS & DOCUMENTARIES:

  • Why Not Home? The Surprising Birth Choices of Doctors and Nurses: This is THE current film on home birth and why some families make this choice…and this film in now available to watch online and/or be purchased for home viewing! From the description on the website: Why would doctors who attend birth in hospitals choose to have their own babies at home? What do they know about birth that others don’t? Join Jessicca Moore, filmmaker and nurse practitioner, on a compelling journey through maternity care in the United States. Told through the lens of doctors, nurses, and midwives, Why Not Home? examines the latest evidence on risks and rewards of different birth settings. The film presents a balanced and accessible view on the latest research, along with moving personal stories of medical practitioners faced with big decisions for their own growing families. Viewers are challenged to move beyond preconceived ideas, and to envision a fresh future for maternity care in America. Watch it here.
  • The Business of Being Born: This film has been out for a number of years now, but it still contains some great information on birth choices, interventions, birth locations and more. You can watch it free on youtube here.
  • Natural Born Babies: short video of several moms and dads describing what influenced them to make the choice to deliver at home. Watch here

ARTICLES:

BOOKS:

  • Your Best Birth: Know All Your Options, Discover the Natural Choices, and Take Back the Birth Experience by Rikki Lake & Abby Epstien.  An easy-to-read overview of options available to moms, this book covers all the possibilities (hospital, home, OB/GYN, midwifery care, etc.) and why different options may work best for different situations and individuals.
  • Ina May’s Guide to Childbirth by Ina May Gaskin. Ina May began her career as a midwife back in the hippie movement of the 1970’s. Since then she has delivered thousands of babies, and has done extensive research in the field of natural birth, and she shares her wisdom in this book. She highlights the need to make a choice of birth location in which the mom feels totally comfortable, be that home, birth center or hospital. Great information about routine procedures, tests, and how to have a healthy pregnancy and wonderful birth experience.
  • Pushed: The Painful Truth About Childbirth and Modern Maternity Care by Jennifer Block. While not a very positive or light-reading style book, this one can really help you understand how medicalized maternity care has become in our country, and enables you to think through some of the routine policies and procedures that are in place in our countries hospitals. Very eye-opening and thought-provoking.

WHAT MIGHT IT LOOK LIKE?

And finally, some couples wonder about what a home birth might look like. What about “the mess”? How can it work at home, if we’ve only experienced the hospital setting? How do midwives adapt to different settings, positions and environments? How does the medical side of midwifery care happen in a home setting? These videos, pictures and personal stories can give you a glimpse of what home birth with a midwife looks like for some families:

I’d love to hear from you-what helped you to determine whether home, birth center or hospital was the right location for your birth? What resources would you recommend to help other families make their decisions? Feel free to comment below, or send me an email with your suggestions. I love hearing from my readers!

Preparing for birth-some excellent resources!

Preparing for birth-some excellent resources!

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I love collecting birth resources-be it books, DVD’s, magazines, articles-you name it! The only problem is, with the limited amount of “extra” time I have (or don’t have!), I don’t always get a chance to preview and read the resources I collect right away. And I find myself hesitant to pass along information to clients and friends that I haven’t read or previewed myself.

    This winter I’ve found myself in the remote hills of Arkansas, with more time on my hands than usual, as my husband is teaching at a small winter Bible School for young people. Keeping the children occupied is my main job here, but with the absence of our usual activities and schedule AND having all our meals provided, I’ve enjoyed the chance to finally dig into some of the resources that have been sitting on my shelves at home waiting for me to get to them.
    So, with that introduction, I want to mention a few EXCELLENT resources that would be worth any of you expectant moms, or anyone wanting to learn more about birth, to take time to watch or read. I can’t believe I’ve had these around this long and didn’t realize what treasures they were!
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The first one I’ll mention is the Parent Class DVD by Spinning Babies teacher Gail Tulley. I’ll confess that this one I have recommended to clients as I’ve taken one of her classes in person myself, and know she has alot to offer. But I didn’t realize how many jewels were in this educational presentation! It was a great refresher to me as a midwife, as Gail does and excellent job of teaching you how to help “make room” for your baby in your pelvis, and help your entire body to function more efficiently with less discomfort. The only drawback with this DVD is that, while she is teaching this class to a participating group of expectant couples, she does get fairly technical with some of her explanations. But in the long run it is helpful, as I think it helps you to get a better idea of WHY some of her positional suggestions and exercises help to eliminate certain issues. Using a great variety of teaching aides, examples, charts and object lessons, Gail shows you how exactly the uterus, baby, brain and body all work together, and how you can help. This would be great DVD for an expectant couple to watch together, or for any midwife or doula to watch in order to give you some great ideas of how to help your clients through specific issues and achieve better positioning for babies. It is well worth the $ you would need to invest, in my opinion! You can find out more about Gail, and purchase this DVD here.
    Next in my pile of resources was a book by Ina May Gaskin. If you’ve been in the childbirth realm long, you’ll recognize this name as one of the most famous midwives in the USA. Ina May has been practicing since the 1970’s, and is probably most well known for her involvement with births on “The Farm” in rural TN. People have come from all over the world to have their babies in this community that has come to be known for it’s amazing work with natural childbirth. I’ll admit that while I’ve appreciated many of the things I’ve read or heard taught by Ina May, I was still a bit skeptical of her book “Guide to Childbirth”. I think I was expecting it to have a real “back to earth” or “hippie” type flare, which I know can turn off families who are looking for evidence-based and scientific information on preparing for birth. I was in for a big surprise! Ina May’s Guide to Childbirth has been amazing. Written in an easy-to-read manner, it is full of so much helpful information. Starting with birth stories to help women realize that birth is both natural and do-able, it then proceeds to teaching you about the things you really need to know about how your body works, how to care for yourself during pregnancy, how to understand tests and the “whys” behind them, helpful suggestions for choosing both caregivers and birth locations, ways to prepare for labor, and the list goes on. I love her honest, down-to-earth style of writing, yet all of her information is based on evidence, research, and studies, and she includes citations and information for further study. If you are wanting just one book to help you understand pregnancy and prepare for birth, this one is it. And it’s not just for moms planning to birth at home-there is information in this book that would help anyone to be better prepared and ready for the amazing experience of labor and delivery.
    The last resource I’ll mention here is a DVD that was given to me by one of my clients. She had purchased it during her last pregnancy, and wanted to pass it on to other moms when she was done with it. “Practicing for an Active Birth”  is basically a childbirth class presented by Instructor Neri Choma by Birth Coach Method. While Neri could probably be a bit more dynamic in her teaching style (I’d suggest watching 30 min. at a time-the DVD is about 2 hrs. and 15 min. long), she does a very good job of helping  you to understand the process of labor and the terms used to talk about each stage, and gives couples LOTS of great position and relaxation techniques. Using charts and models, she helps you to learn how to visualize what is happening during each stage of labor, and how you might be able to help facilitate comfort and relaxation during each stage, working together as couples. While I think that it is best for couples to take a live childbirth class whenever possible, this would be an excellent option for those who might not have that opportunity in their area.
    I personally feel like much of preparing for a great labor and birth involves understanding how your body works so you are not tensed with fear of the unknown. If you KNOW what is happening, understand WHY you are experiencing certain sensations, and have IDEAS for what to do and when, you and your partner will be able to relax and work together much better. Moms (and dads!) that are prepared tend to do much better emotionally and physically through the marathon of labor. I would strongly recommend you look into any or all of these resources as ways to prepare for a wonderful experience of bringing your baby into the world.
    I’d love to hear about what worked for you. Do you have any favorite resources you would care to share with others? Tell us about it in the comments! And consider sharing  this post with your pregnant friends to help them hear about ways they can prepare for labor and birth from the comfort of their own home.